Wednesday, 28 October 2009

My Self and Not I

I walk, and a memory emerges,
Sudden and uninvited.
Overwhelming, it controls me.

I bite my tongue, I curse it.
Precious tears touch my cheeks,
What pain; it fills inside me.

Bursting into external action.
What hope, what life,
do I see before me?

Barely I resist, but now I'm only failing.
I see it; time. Ticking ever closer.
Desperately I exist, but now I'm only fading.

Thursday, 15 October 2009

Appointment Kept

Must try harder
Again the bell tolls
Given what we know
Lucky tender souls

Hiding from trust
Free for want of this
Slow to gain the same
Easier to miss

Time for open hat
Ask what are we here
Grasp the empty knot
Only for our fear

That it came whole
Glad for longer day
See not in the sun
But further away

Tuesday, 6 October 2009

Be Me

Would you define my nature
Would you erase my choice, for me?
Would you like to control me as
You believe yourself free?
I cannot maintain the struggle
Dead or without will; I need to be.
Or not to be.


Life. Absurd.
Desire. Disorder.
No judgement.
No justice.
My needs will never be met.
Temporary at best, hunger never sated.
I learn. I conflict with external forces.
I think. Considerate. Selfish. For no one.
I hope. And I continue to.
I finally recognise the futility
Of existence.
I must consider suicide.
No more.